Recently, Mr. Kuder took time out of his busy schedule to answer The Modern Woman’s Divorce Guide’s questions about divorce.

1. What are the grounds for divorce in your state? Living separate and apart without cohabitation for one year or mutual voluntary separation without cohabitation for six months.

2. Does fault (such as infidelity or domestic violence) affect the outcome of a divorce in your state? If so, how? Domestic violence creates a presumption against joint custody, and the cause of the breakup of the marriage is a factor to be taken into account in the Equitable Distribution of property.

3. If a woman is preparing for divorce what, if anything, can she do to improve the outcome of her case? Get a competent lawyer and work with her or him. Learn all she can about family income, expenses and assets and liabilities. Be morally and humanly correct and reasonable.

4. What are some of the biggest obstacles women face in divorce? A lack of control over the family income and assets; a greater willingness to focus on the needs of children; being less unreasonable than men; and a tendency not to be assertive in an assertive realm.

5. When should a woman take her case to trial? When shouldn’t she? One always has to do a case-specific, cost-benefit analysis in order to answer this question.

6. How can a woman make divorce easier on her children? Get professional advice from counselors and her lawyer. Always make decisions after thinking and answering: “What is best for the children?”

7. What qualities should a woman look for in a divorce lawyer? Experience, intelligence and a willingness to recognize her as an intelligent, involved partner.

8. What should a woman do if she disagrees with her divorce lawyer’s recommendations? Begin by talking out the disagreement with her lawyer. Then get a second opinion, which doesn’t include her husband’s opinion. Try to work it out, but if you cannot, change lawyers.

9. If you could impart any of your wisdom to a woman who is going through divorce, what would it be? Do not take the process personally; and do not take yourself too seriously. Just set goals, work out strategies and then execute.

This article is not legal advice. You should consult an attorney if you have questions that relate to your divorce and finances.

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