Believe it or not, at this phase in the divorce process you may have already run into a few problems or changed your mind about the whole thing. If you have, we’re going to try and help you remedy the problems and get back on, or off, track. Here are a few common problems that arise during the initial phases of divorce and suggestions for remedying them.

1. You filed the Petition or Complaint and are ready to serve your husband, but you don’t know where he is. Proper service is essential in a divorce, annulment or legal separation because it gives the court “personal jurisdiction” or the power to make decisions that will affect your husband. If you don’t know where your husband is, you may have several options for satisfying the legal service requirements in your state. If your state laws permit, and you have diligently tried to personally serve your husband to no avail, you may satisfy the service requirements by (a) mailing the Petition/Complaint and Summons via first class postage prepaid mail to your husband at the post office box where he regularly receives his mail or his usual mailing address, or (b) leaving a copy of the Petition/Complaint and Summons at your husband’s house, usual place of abode or place of business in the presence of a competent member of the household or a person apparently in charge of his place of business who is informed of the contents of the documents.

2. You filed the Petition or Complaint and your husband avoided service by refusing to open the door, running from the process server, refusing to let the server into a gated community or by using some other obvious avoidance tactic. Again, as discussed above, proper service is essential in a divorce, annulment or legal separation because it gives the court “personal jurisdiction” or the power to make decisions that will affect your husband. If your state laws permit and your personal process server diligently tried to effect service, but your husband intentionally avoided it, you may (i) leave the papers in some “appropriate place” where they would likely get your husband’s attention (e.g. dropping the documents a few feet in front of your husband, placing them under the windshield wiper of his car, putting them under the door of his home), or (ii) use any of the techniques listed above in paragraph 1.

3. You filed the Petition or Complaint but your husband is enlisted and on active duty in Iran or Afghanistan. If your husband is overseas or deployed at a time of war, you may ask the military authorities so serve your husband with the divorce petition. This may be done through the “duty post” or the Legal Assistance office on the military base. Unfortunately however, the duty post can refuse service and a federal law called the Service Member’s Civil Relief Act of 2003 can put a stay on your divorce proceedings until sixty days after your husband returns stateside.

4. You filed the Petition or Complaint and even with reasonable diligence, you are unable to serve your husband via personal service or any of the alternate methods described herein above. If your state laws permit, and your personal process server diligently tried to effect service, but could not find your husband, you may effect service by publication. However in most states you must get the courts permission to serve your husband through a newspaper publication before doing so. Additionally, you must follow your state’s laws very carefully to ensure you satisfy the publication requirements, which generally include publishing the summons in a newspaper most likely to give your husband actual notice, both in and out of state, for four consecutive weeks following up the publication with a mailing if your husband’s address is ascertained during the period of publication.

5. You filed the Petition or Complaint, but you’ve changed your mind and don’t want to go through with the divorce. If you filed the Petition or Complaint but have not yet served your husband, most states will allow you to unilaterally dismiss the case by completing and submitting the necessary request for dismissal. If you already served your husband, most states will require you and your husband to sign and file a dismissal of the case or appear in court to request a dismissal. If your husband has already been served and he wants to pursue the divorce even though you do not, he may be allowed to do so under your state’s laws and unfortunately, you won’t be able to stop it.

If you encountered any of these problems or had a change of hear, your assignment this week is to serve your husband using any of the methods allowed in your state, or dismiss the Petition or Complaint. Good luck.

This is not legal advice. You should consult an attorney if you have legal questions that relate to your specific divorce. Technorati Tags: weekly divorce tip filing divorce divorced divorcing service Petition Complaint summons problems trouble husband enlisted active duty military divorced legal women woman law