Herndon Inge, III is a fellow of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, a member of the Alabama Bar Association, Family Law Section, and a published author, whose articles have appeared in a number of legal publications, including the ABA’s Child Support Prosecutor’s Journal, FairShare, the Tennessee Family Lawyer and the Alabama Family Lawyer. Mr. Inge’s family law practice is located in Mobile, Alabama, and he may be reached at 251/432-1444 or hinge@herndoninge.com.

Recently, Mr. Inge took time out of his busy schedule to answer The Modern Woman’s Divorce Guide’s questions about divorce.

1. What are the grounds for divorce in your state? The grounds for a no-fault divorce are (1) incompatibility, (2) irretrievable breakdown of the marriage, and/or (3) voluntary abandonment.

The grounds for a fault divorce are: (1) physical and incurable incapacitation at the time of entering into the marriage, (2) adultery, (3) imprisonment, (4) habitual drunkenness or to habitual use of opium, morphine, cocaine or other “like” drugs, (5) incurable insanity, (6) pregnancy at the time of marriage by a man other than the husband, (7) domestic violence or abuse, and (8) living separate and apart from the bed and board of the husband for two years.

99% of time, the grounds asserted by parties in divorce are incompatibility of temperament and irreconcilable differences.

2. Does fault (such as infidelity or domestic violence) affect the outcome of a divorce in your state? If so, how? Yes. Alabama is an “equitable distribution” state and fault is one of the 8 or so factors considered in awarding alimony, attorney fees and property settlement.

3. If a woman is preparing for divorce what, if anything, can she do to improve the outcome of her case? Act reasonably, concentrate on the children and do not provoke her husband.

4. What are some of the biggest obstacles women face in divorce? Manipulation and threats by their husbands, “bully” tactics and not having the “guts” to fight when necessary.

5. When should a woman take her case to trial? When shouldn’t she? When her lawyer advises her that it is worth it to go to trial and NOT when it is too costly, emotionally or financially.

6. How can a woman make divorce easier on her children? Be reasonable and, before taking each step, ask herself “Can I do this without unnecessarily hurting the kids?”

7. What qualities should a woman look for in a divorce lawyer? Loyalty, compassion, toughness, trial skills, gray hair and wrinkles.

8. What should a woman do if she disagrees with her divorce lawyer’s recommendations? FIRE the SOB

9. If you could impart any of your wisdom to a woman who is going through divorce, what would it be? BE TOUGH! The terms of the divorce, such as alimony, the property settlement and child support are going to have long term consequences, so be certain that what her husband has offered is fair.

10. Are there any divorce books or resources that you would like to recommend to women going through divorce?

• Doctor’s Wives by Cynthia Smith
• Women Who Love Too Much by Robin Norwod
• Men Who Hate Women, and Women Who Love Them by Susan Forward and Joan Torres
• Passages, by Gail Shehey

This article is not legal advice and the opinions expressed in the article are those of the interviewee and are not endorsed by The Modern Woman’s Divorce Guide. You should consult an attorney if you have questions that relate to your divorce and finances.

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