The Price Of Freedom
When the judge signed my divorce decree in the late 80s, I breathed a sigh of relief. Even though I agreed my husband would receive all our savings and I, all our debt, I was ecstatic. In my mind $10,000 was a small price to pay to be free of my husband forever. I was in graduate school at the time, getting by with my parent’s financial support, and I couldn’t bear to tell them about the agreement I made. Instead, 2 years after my wedding and shortly after the divorce, I returned unused wedding china to a major department store, which gave me a $600 cash refund. I also applied for and received a student loan, which deferred any debt payments until six months after graduation. I used the loan to pay my tuition and other grad school expenses, and used the money my parents gave me monthly to pay off my ex-husband’s debts. I repaid the student loans a few years after graduation. At times my financial situation was a bit dire but for the freedom it gave me, it was worth it.
When the judge signed my second divorce decree over a decade later, I again breathed a sigh of relief. In some naïve way I thought, like my first husband, I would be free of my second husband forever. I must have been delusional. At the time, we had 2 young children, of whom we shared joint legal and physical custody. It wasn’t that I thought he’d be an absentee father sending child support payments monthly, I just subconsciously excluded him from the picture: Divorce = The End. Silly me. In the second instance Divorce = The Beginning. The Beginning of countless trials and tribulations, many of which I will share with you in time.
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Posted by ModDiva on January 7th, 2007 filed in Real Women |
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