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Divorce 101: Are You Thinking About Divorce?If you are thinking about divorce, you may be telling yourself you can’t survive on your own. Don’t trick yourself into believing this. Divorce is life-altering. |
It can change everything, including where you live, the amount of time you spend with your children, how you spend your money and whether or not you work. These changes are often difficult, but with proper planning you can survive and become stronger, happier and more successful than ever before.
If you can’t imagine being happier after divorce, read Ashton Applewhite’s book Cutting Loose: Why Women Who End Their Marriages Do So Well. If, on the other hand, you already sense life will be better after divorce, take these steps to make sure you are being reasonable and, if you are, to begin planning for divorce.
1. If you’re in an abusive relationship, please
get help immediately.
Call the National Domestic Violence hotline at (800) 799-SAFE (7233) or go to a women’s shelter in your community. If you need help finding a shelter use our Domestic Violence Resources for Women. Please protect yourself — you deserve to be happy and safe!
Talk to your therapist or trusted friends who are divorced. Join an online divorce group or read the books on our Reading List, written specifically to help you decide whether to end a relationship. If you don’t have a therapist, find one.
The following articles and tools will assist you:
- Guidelines for Finding a Therapist
- Tips for Choosing a Therapist
- Therapist Qualification Questionnaire
Have in-depth conversations about your marriage, finances and children. Ask the lawyers to explain your state’s family laws and how divorce will affect you.
The following articles and tools will assist you:
- Guidelines for Finding a Family Lawyer
- Guidelines for First Telephone Calls to Lawyers
- Lawyer Evaluation Worksheet
- Initial Consultation Questionnaire
- Tips for Choosing a Family Lawyer
- Guidelines for Negotiating your Lawyer’s Contract
Get your finances in order, gather documents you may need during the divorce process and do everything you can to prepare for the journey ahead.
The following articles and tools will assist you:
This article is not legal advice. You should consult an attorney if you have legal questions that relate to your specific divorce.
RELATED READING
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A Judge's Guide to Divorce: Uncommon Advice from the Bench
We The People's Guide to Divorce: A Do-It-Yourself Guide to Reaching an Agreement with Your Spouse and Getting a Hassle-Free Divorce
Fair Share Divorce for Women, Second Edition: The Definitive Guide to Creating a Winning Solution
Winning Custody: A Woman's Guide to Retaining Custody of Her Children
Mothers on Trial: The Battle for Children and Custody
Controlling People: How to Recognize, Understand, and Deal With People Who Try to Control You
Take the Bully by the Horns: Stop Unethical, Uncooperative, or Unpleasant People from Running and Ruining Your Life
Legal Research Illustrated, 8th Ed.
Legal Research in a Nutshell: By Morris L. Cohen, Kent C. Olson (Nutshell Series)
Legal Research: How to Find & Understand the Law
Handbook on Child Support Enforcement
RELATED RESOURCES
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