Parenting After Divorce You can help your children lead satisfying lives after divorce. The keys are to focus on their healthy development, move things forward and minimize possible disruptions. Below are some helpful guidelines:

• Manage your time and lifestyle so your children continue to attend the same schools and play with the same friends, as they did during your marriage.
  
  
• Maintain your expectations about household chores, homework, extra–curricular activities and your children’s previous commitments.
  
  
• Maintain supportive but structured rules and discipline.
  
  
• Establish new rituals and routines that provide stability for your children in their new lives.
  
  
• Provide consistent rules in both parent’s homes. If this isn’t possible, help your children understand that rules must be obeyed in each household, just as different rules are obeyed at school and at home.
  
  
• Talk to your children about their feelings, if they want to talk.
  
  
• Resist the temptation to compete with your ex–husband for your children’s love and attention.
  
  
• Resist the temptation to make negative comments about your ex–husband in front of your children.
  
  
• Communicate directly with your ex–husband instead of passing messages through your children.
  
  
• Help your children remain connected to their father and relatives through telephone calls, emails and letters. Do this only if your ex–husband isn’t a threat to your children’s physical, emotional or mental well-being.
  
  

This article is not legal advice. You should consult an attorney if you have legal questions that relate to your specific divorce.

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